What you should expect from a good reader (and what not to)
I wrote on this topic in my newsletter a while back, it was likely over a year ago. But I thought it bore repeating. While there are some very good readers out there, and some excellent ones too, there are also some who are a bit unscrupulous and even downright crooked and dishonest. Something which breaks my heart. Unfortunately sometimes people run into a reader of the latter type and lose all faith in Tarot. Which is such a shame as it truly can be one of the most amazing things life has to offer, when done properly,
What you should expect
- If you come to a reader for a reading, it's all about you. It's not about some hidden agenda, it's always about meeting your needs in the best way.
- A good reading should always leave you in a better place than before the reading took place. It should offer hope, insight, healing, answers, solutions, be empowering, and/or give you needed information to make the best decision in the situation.
- A good reader should have a code of ethics that they adhere to and don't deviate from. There may be certain types of questions they are not comfortable with and won't read on, and they will be able to give you a valid reason why.
- The questions asked in a reading should be answered within the scope of that reading. It does happen on occasion though that we ask a question and the cards avoid the question in favor of telling us something we need to know more. But it is never appropriate for a reader to tell you you need additional readings to find the answers or even of ask you if you want them.
- True caring and empathy are important parts of it.
- A good reading should be complete unto itself and a good reader will be open to answering any questions you have about the reading afterwards.
- A good reading should contain information specific to your situation and not just information that would apply to anyone. Eg telling someone, they will meet someone new in their lives this month, or they will feel a bit confused over something this month could apply to anyone. (You may at times see some of this in my newsletter readings as those readings need to apply to literally hundreds of people at once, but a personal reading is a very different thing). But telling someone that their boyfriend who has been afraid of commitment will suddenly change his mind and decide he is ready, just for example, is specific as it presupposes a boyfriend who had a fear of commitment and that does not apply to everyone.
What you should not expect
- A good reading should never make you feel scared or negative in any way. This can be a well known scam. Unscrupulous reader sometimes charge minimal amounts for the reading and then tell the querent that something is very wrong in their lives and for a large fee they will fix it or sell them the cure. If you ever run into this, it's a pretty well known scam... Never trust a reader who does this. They are generally making it all up and just plain being dishonest for their own personal gain.
- A reader who asks you not to discuss what came up in your reading is one not to be trusted Normally once you have a reading it belongs to you and you can do anything you want with it. Also a good reader would be happy for you to share, as word of mouth and positive feedback are always helpful. If a reader asks you not to share what came up with others, something is wrong. I once heard of a whole classroom who all went to see a Tarot reader as a school assignment. The reader took them one by one and told each of them not to discuss what she had told them. After the experience, they all did discuss it together and they realized she had told them all the exact same thing, pretty well word for word. Someone who does not want you to discuss things has something to hide.
- It is not appropriate for a reader to ever tell you you need another reading, or to even suggest it. Worst of all to ask when you would like to schedule another reading. None of those are appropriate.
- It is also not appropriate for a reader to malign other professions and tell people they should come to them instead of visiting a professional in another field. I once had a rather persistent and annoying would be reader for me who kept sending me unscrupulous e-mails about how how people with emotional problems should never see a psychologist but should consult her instead. While Tarot, in the right hands, can be a wonderful enlightening thing....it is NOT ever a substitute for needed medical help. Or real therapy Or legal aid. A good reader will tell you this outright and even refuse a reading to someone whose needs are best served by a professional in another field.
Coming next month: Not all Tarots decks are are created equal.